Monthly Archives: July 2012

They forced me to write this.


“Half of being witty is simply being the first to notice when something clever accidentally slipped out.”


Moist Spandex

In an attempt to conjure the most unappealing two word pairing this is what I came up with.


Do what you like

and like what you do,

and giving it thought,

I think I like you.



The parents are back — surprise attack.


“Life is a lot like driving. If you keep turning around and looking back you’ll probably crash. You got to keep moving forward — that’s why we have mirrors.”



Getting to know someone is similar to exploring the inside of a mansion; the mind is huge and complicated, and snooping around in the bedroom is sure to get you kicked out, so you must approach the house with a certain demeanor. You can’t see what’s in the kitchen or the living room without first having been let inside (peering through the windows is not the best way to see a house). You can usually tell what kind of person lives in a house by the exterior. Some houses have a door bell, a big brass knocker, or a speaker system to be let in, so you must act accordingly to become as approachable as you can to the owner. Whether or not they open the door and invite you in is up to them, but the more you can relate to someone else, the more doors will be opened for you, and the more rooms you will be able to see.


lots of kids are playing four square.

Some play violins with horse hair.

I’m so tired, oh so tired.

Please, I need relief. Anyone.



I love how during election season a campaign is basically an investigation into the other candidate’s background to see where he made mistakes in his past. First of all, you can’t learn from mistakes if you don’t have them, and everyone has made them, so what’s the point of that? How does that help the voters have confidence in the candidates if all we see are mistakes? Secondly, in the land of opportunity and second chances, we sure seem to dwell on the past and use it as a measuring tool for what will happen in the future. It’s like we’re all joining hands and saying “history will repeat itself no matter what.” If we don’t think the candidates can move forward from their pasts, then what makes us think our country can move forward from the past? If all we care about is the past, then we are surely to be stuck in it and react to everything that happens in the future because we didn’t even have our heads turned the right way. There’s so much irony in how campaigns are run it makes me laugh and cry.


Do you think I’m attractive?

Are you asking me or are you telling me?

I’m asking you to tell me.

It doesn’t matter what I say.

It does now.


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