WARNING: Contains sexual humor, drug references, and language.
WARNING: Do not use in the shower.
WARNING: Hot contents may burn you.
WARNING: Aim away from face.
WARNING: Contents may explode under pressure.
WARNING: You may stop reading the word “Warning.”
WARNING: Do not ignore this warning.
WARNING: This could kill you.
WARNING: Contents not suitable for mature audiences.
WARNING: Do not use this product under any circumstances.
WARNING: Don’t get too curious.
WARNING: Keep out of reach of children, teenagers, couples.
WARNING: This end up.
WARNING: Contents may shatter when broken.
WARNING: Alarm will sound.
WARNING: Wearing a helmet does not guarantee your safety.
WARNING: Wearing a seat belt does not guarantee the safety of others.
WARNING: May contain nuts.
WARNING: You are what you eat.
WARNING: Do not ingest.
WARNING: May cause drowsiness.
WARNING: May cause lousiness.
WARNING: Do not take orally or rectally, or without paying first.
WARNING: Do not attempt to stop the blade with your hands.
WARNING: Objects in mirror are backwards.
WARNING: For indoor and outdoor use only.
WARNING: Do not attempt to fly indoors.
WARNING: Theft of this product is a crime.
WARNING: You are entering a drug-free zone.
WARNING: You are entering a care-free zone.
WARNING: Do not place bag over head.
WARNING: Do not engage in vigilante justice.
WARNING: Glasses may impair vision.
WARNING: May increase risk of pregnancy.
WARNING: Do not shake contents of crib.
WARNING: Do not laugh at the natives.
WARNING: Do not laugh at the naives.
WARNING: Mispellings may occer.
WARNING: Slippery when wet.
WARNING: Do not use while unconscious.
WARNING: Do not use while subconscious.
WARNING: Only compliment one woman.
WARNING: Effects may result in side effects.
WARNING: Do not run with sharp objects.
WARNING: Do not run drugs for the cartel.
WARNING: Wear safety goggles while attempting this maneuver.
WARNING: Repeating something too much may lessen its impact.
WARNING: You’ve been warned.
allmostrelevant 
lol :)
Lol…
This reminds me of the travel warnings by the US State Department: http://andreasmoser.wordpress.com/2010/10/05/dont-travel-to-europe/
Forewarned is forearmed. LOL
But most importantly, “Burn before reading.”
Ha! Very nice.
LOL!!!
Reading warning labels may cause serious side effects. Do not read while driving or using heavy machinery. Do not drive while sleeping. Do not remove warning labels under penalty of heavy machinery falling on driver side.
I am duly warned but now I am also s-c-a-r-e-d. Of everything. :-)
I feel very safely educated now.