Bessy’s the best pet cow ever!
No, she’s not a pet…
Look! Goldie’s sleeping upside-down.
No, Goldie’s not sleeping.
She said I looked good.
No, she was just being nice.
Everyone laughed at my joke.
No, they were just laughing at you in general.
If I just had enough money.
No, if you just loved yourself first.
She’s the most beautiful girl ever.
No, you’re just drunk.
I want to be famous.
No, you’re just lonely.
I think she loves me.
No, she just said Hi.
I think I love her.
I think you’re crazy.
allmostrelevant 
I love your post. may I know you? Im from indonesia,
Loved your post. It’s so cynically hilarious!
Thanks so much. I swear I’ll get back to writing here in a bit
This was so cute, oh gosh.
haha thanks so much!
Loved it! We spend our lives in self-deception and the internal dialogue trying to keep us balanced.
true dat ;)
Oww.