I never really understood Friday the 13th. Is everyone on the planet supposed to have horribly bad luck on this day? Is there some sort of luck-karma built up that is all released on one day so every other day can be pleasant? It’s just a day, and I happen to like fridays, so why does it have to be bad luck all of a sudden? Why can’t it be a day of good luck? Like all of a sudden everyone wins the lottery, or all the lights turn green, or your boss says to take the day off? That’s not really even what I wonder about though; it’s superstitions in general. My theory is that superstitions just prevent us from doing stupid things that are really just common sense in the first place, and “bad luck” is just all of the pins you knock down while bowling down the ‘stupid lane’ with bumpers one. You hear people say “Don’t walk under a ladder, it’s bad luck.” “If a black cat walks across your path, it’s bad luck.” “If you open an umbrella inside, it’s bad luck.” “If you break a mirror…” etc.
Really, this is what I think happens:
Don’t walk under a ladder because that’s stupid. Something could fall on you, or you could knock it over.
If a black cat, probably a stray if it’s out alone, walks across your path then you’re probably in a bad neighborhood, so stay away from ‘black cats.’
If you open an umbrella inside you’ll just look stupid because it never rains inside.
And don’t break mirrors! Why would you break a mirror? It makes a huge mess and it sucks to replace. Furthermore you or someone else could end up stepping on glass. Be careful!
So just use some common sense… or else it’ll be bad luck.
I suppose as your writing teacher I’m supposed to give you an assignment. So for that assignment I would like you to write something.
Is that it?
No, something. Something in particular.
What does it need to be about?
Like I said, something.
Well, if there’s basically no rules, can I just sneeze on a piece of paper and turn it in?
This isn’t art class–there are rules here. I try to keep it simple, but you people keep trying to be creative and keep messing it up, so I don’t add any more rules. I’ve had many students try to write about anything and it never works out.
Okay, so how long does it need to be?
Write until you think I’m convinced, then stop.